A Stream of CoNsCiOuSnEsS....Day 2 of Pre-Service Foster Care Training

Friday, October 21, 2011

8:00 a.m. came too early. After nine hours in a classroom yesterday hearing people vent about their problems, I needed more than a cup of coffee and a muffin to start the day.

I am not your therapist. This is not a counseling session.

I left my kiddos again for nine hours today to sit in the same room with the same people and the same problems. (Day 2 of our three day, twenty-seven hour pre-service foster care training).

Am I crazy?

It's a possibility.

Lots of information.....some of it actually good.

I tried to multitask without being obviously rude, but it was hard. Mostly I doodled.

I missed my kids.

I was grateful for my kids.

I felt blessed. How blessed we have been!

Lunch at Tana Thai. Yummm. An hour away from the counseling session was good.

Back to the grind. In the room. The same people speak up. Everyone makes the questions about their personal situations.

That's not what the questions are about!

It's hot. It's cold. My butt is numb. And I'm bored.

Twenty-seven hours in three days is probably too much.

Are we sure we want to do this?

A resounding yes.

Because He has something planned for us. Will it be what we expect? I highly doubt it.

Will I have to love a child and then let him/her go?

I'm almost positive.

Can I actually do that?

" With me, you can do anything.....For I know the plans I have for you....."

Will I have to mentor and be an example to a birth family? Probably.

Can I do that? Am I a good example?

There won't be anything easy about this.

A lot of trust...

A lot of faith...

He has called us to something bigger than us. I have no doubt that He has plans for us.

I'm pretty sure they're going to be painful....the plans that is.

I'm pretty sure I'll hate parts of it.

I know the plans I have for you.

Ughhhh. Sometimes I wonder....why? Why me? Why now? Why like this?

I guess I don't have to have all the answers.

We make it to 7:30 p.m.
Out the door.

Head to UCO. High school football game.

So many people I love. My very best friend. Meghann and Rodney. Her momma and daddy. My favorite high school teacher: Coach Ryker. Danielle and Ryan (+3). Love to chat with them always. Wished they all lived closer.

Lots of memories of high school football games on the road.

My kids play. It's Luke's first high school football game.

They don't want to leave. Brian doesn't feel great.

In the car, Addy says her tummy hurts.

I think we're all fighting off a bug.

Home to jammies and bed.

Tomorrow another day.

....day 70 of a year of writing.....

1 comment:

  1. You are paying some really hard prices. Someday some little person is going to be so thankful that you did...and are. My dear friend is a foster parent and I've seen how she's had to give up some of the kids and how it tears her heart. It takes such a special person to do hard things for these precious kids.


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