Where have I been?

Thursday, September 20, 2012

I think it's a good question since I have taken off from writing for a considerable amount of time now. It's been too long honestly.

There are things that my soul wants to do. One of them is run {which I am not doing at all at the moment since this child inside me is quite uncomfortable to even walk with} and the other is write.

There are times that I feel like I'll burst at the seams if I don't do one of the two.

For so long, so much of me and my life was lived day by day right here. Part of me does not miss that at all. But there is this other part that yearns to re-live things here on the screen.

I read once that what makes a good story is simply the desire for the reader to want to know what's coming next.

I feel like I'm stuck in the middle of a good story, and I'm the one wanting to know what's coming next.

I think the last time we talked, we had randomly had someone knock on our front door asking if we would be interested in selling our house.

This knock came on the same day that I spent in prayer asking the Lord to knock my stubborn soul in the head with a sign of sorts that I wouldn't be able to deny. And then came the knock on the door.

Who does that? Who randomly asks someone with no sign in their yard if they're interested in selling their house? (Well, technically my husband has done that, but besides him...who does that?)

It was an answer to a prayer. It was a knock that swept away my doubts about moving. It was timely and almost humorous. And it was exactly what I needed.

This entire decision to move to California has been a complete test of my faith. I can't deny that it's where we're supposed to be. I can't tell you why (which makes it more difficult to explain), but I can't deny my peace in our decision.

{Side note}: Man I feel better with my hands on these keys!

moving on......

We have since been back to California to look for houses. Our timing is less than convenient to say the least. We looked at real estate in the middle of September, and we can't close until December. It's not exactly good timing. And with the newest addition to the Dalke family coming in late October or early November, we really won't have another chance to go back again.

We did find 3 houses that we like. Two that we love. One that just felt like home to both of us.

We made an offer on two houses. One of them has really become our 3rd choice and since being home, I've felt weird about it for some reason. But we made an offer because it is a short sale, and we were able to put in the first offer.

But we also made an offer on the house that we both felt was "the one." It's hard to become attached to a house like that because we don't really know if it's what the Lord has for us or not (even though part of me believes that it is).

I walked the property while Brian talked to the neighbor (and the 22 horses that she boards which is kind of cool) and prayed. I just prayed. I honestly didn't know what else to do. I feel a little helpless in all of this. With our timing, there really isn't much that I can physically do to swing things in our favor.

My heart so obviously felt at home in this place, and the only thing I knew to do was the Lord over and over and over again if this is what He has for us.

It's not perfect by any means. But I can't explain the way it made me feel the moment we walked in the door. Home. It just felt like home.

It's a ranch style house on 5 acres with a ting little pool in the front yard (so random, I know). There is literally a door in almost every room (because why would there not be? It's southern California people....of course there are a million ways to get outside).

The entire house has been gutted and remodeled. And there is a 1,000 square foot guest house. Yes! A guest house.....so you can all come stay! (Not all at once.....I'll come up with a calendar or something.)

Plus, there is plenty of space for Brian to plant a vineyard or citrus trees or whatever we want. There is plenty of space to entertain, and we could eventually host all sorts of things like leadership retreats, women's retreats, weddings possibly, plus all our family whenever they want to come......who knows....the possibilites are endless. It's sort of like a dream. And honestly, if it works out, it will have to be God orchestrating it all.

When we made the original offer, we found out there was actually already another offer on the house that was basically very similar to our offer. The other offer had been in for 2 weeks but they hadn't accepted yet. It was a full price offer (just like ours) with a closing date at the end of the year (very close to our desired closing date), but they needed the investors who own the property to carry an $85,000 loan because they can only get approved for a certain amount.

Our offer was a full price offer that would close on December 10th.

The investors decided that our offer really wasn't "better." I told Brian that if it was supposed to be our house....if it really was the house He had prepared for us, then it would work out.

We got a call later that day saying that the investors had talked and thought that maybe they would rather have an offer of more than full price (which we were willing to pay). They thought that that would put them in a better position since they wouldn't have to carry a loan like they were going to have to with the other offer.

I start to think that maybe this is the Lord working in our favor......

We offer more than full price, and then we wait.

And we wait.

And they decide that they're not sure which offer they want to take.

One of the problems with California real estate is that the buyer is extremely protected and can walk away at any point. The people with the other offer decided that they could move their closing date up to 30 days from now (but they still need the investors to carry a portion of their loan).  And the investors would rather have our more than full price offer, but they're afraid that we'll walk before December, and then they'll be kicking themselves when they could have sold the house in October.

So we wait.

And I let go of control.

And I give it up to the Lord. I honestly don't know if that's where He wants us or not.

When our offer was denied the 1st time, we quickly moved on and started talking about our 2nd choice. Believing that maybe that's where he wanted us.

My heart is still in the 1st house. Our 1st choice. The one that just felt like home.

Everything in me wants to know where we're going. I want to know what's next. What happens next?

I've never in my life let go of control like this. But that's where we are, and where we've been.

Where have we been? Seeking. Praying. Giving up control.

And this is where we'll wait for what's next.

Promising to keep you updated.......

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