Good Fruit

I love it when I read something that was exactly what I needed to hear right when I needed to hear it. I just read the most beautiful blog post from Ms. Beth (aka Beth Moore). You can read it here if you're interested. It just brought a smile to my face. They were the words I needed to hear.

I have been struggling a lot lately with my attitude and perspective about our life right now. Here's the deal....we are crazy blessed in the most amazing ways, but this decision to foster and bring two babies into our home has changed everything.

It has changed life as we know it completely. And while I often get caught up in how hard it is to have all these kids here, I do not want to stop bearing fruit for the Lord. I don't. If we stop bearing fruit (even in the hard times) then what is it worth?

Ms. Beth tells us in the above mentioned post:

The Holy Spirit penned it this way in John 15: “Every branch that does bear fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit.” The purpose for this massive cutting away of what is dead is to make room for what is alive. It is for our health. Not for our end.

I know that He's cutting away....the Lord is pruning the dead branches to make room for new blooms. I know this entire process is making me better. It's making me more like Him. It's forcing me to be selfless even when I don't want to be (which is most of the time, just for the record).  And I know I'm changing because it hurts a little. I'm uncomfortable. I don't honestly feel like I'm bearing any fruit at all at the moment. I feel like I'm doing a lot of complaining and whining.

Again Ms. Beth has a great scripture to remind me what I know in my soul to be true:

“As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me.” Catch the nuance in Galatians 3:3 – “Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?”

One thing is for certain about this entire process, I can't do this alone. When I try to do it without the Lord in front of it, I completely lose it....remember, just a few days ago?  That day everything came to a crashing halt not only because we had been out of our normal routine, but also (and largely) because I had been out of God's Word. How on Earth did I expect to bear fruit when I wasn't even connected to Him?

You can't do it.

So, really more than anything, this post is a prayer. That the Lord would continue to allow me to bear fruit even in the hard times.

This is one of the hardest things we have ever done as a family, but that doesn't mean that the world has to stop. We can still give and love and serve and bear fruit even when life is hard. I know it's up to me. I have to remain in Him and connected to Him if I want that to happen, but I know it's possible. He is constantly preparing us for more. How can we grow if he doesn't stretch us and challenge us?

Oh that I may bear Him good fruit even in stony ground!

.....day 229 of a year of writing.....