A Dilemma

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

We have a dilemma at our house.

If you've been a follower for a while, you know that we absolutely LOVE Addison's school. As does she!

We all LOVE it. This morning, Luke and I spent 20 minutes out in the pasture hanging with the horses and llamas and ducks before he went off to his "school" aka Mother's Day Out.

Just a few yards from the nearest intersection lies a piece of school serenity on the outskirts of a busy and bustling city.  It's a place of joy, happiness, and bliss. With only a handful of kids for each teacher, the relationships between teacher and student and student and student are strong.

Creativity and music burst out of the building. And Addison begs to go.

But when I pick her up, she is a different child. She is tired, cranky, and downright mean.

My precious 4 year old baby girl could better be described as a brat. There just is no better word. She's hateful, demanding, and lacking of self control from the time I pick her up until the time she goes to bed.

Unless of course, she falls asleep. Like she does on many afternoons.

I drop her off at school every morning between 8:30 and 9:00 and pick her up at 3:45. Now here's the dilemma. She's being an angel at school. Completely cooperative. Completely engaged. When she gets home, she's a complete bear!

I know she's exhausted. I just don't know what else to do.

I mentioned the problem to her teacher last Friday. She didn't seem too concerned, but of course she wouldn't. She's getting the sweet, fun, happy Addison.

I'm not getting much Addison at all. She's either at school or she's asleep or she's downright mad.

The whole situation really makes me want to homeschool even more (which I mentioned to her the other day, and she was not one bit interested). I know she's having fun at school and learning a lot at the same time. I just don't feel like her being this tired is the best thing for her four-year-old body.

I don't know a lot of other programs (if any) that have four-year-old programs that are all day long.

I guess I really just need some advice. I don't know what to do, but as a mom, I know I have to do something.

She's the only four--ld in her class (the other four kiddos are five), but they all went to school all day long last year when they were four.

Her teacher mentioned maybe only four days a week if she didn't get adjusted, but I don't know if that will really help from day to day.  I just don't really know what the best alternative is.

Any advice? It would be greatly appreciated.

.....day 33 of a year of writing.....


  1. Would they be willing to do a half day with you? The school sounds like heaven on Earth. Possibly similar to one here in Tulsa (Riverfield). She does just sound exhausted. What about a "required" 30 minute nap just after school. Would they allow a 2:00 pickup each day for you to head home for nap time? That precious little 4 year-old just needs some sleep. Tony (age 8) often wipes out after school. It is just so much work to grow and learn!

  2. What time does she go to sleep at night? Have you had her checked for anemia? I know my middle one was the same way last year, completely exhausted after school. I had her checked out by our pediatrician and sure enough, she was anemic! A few vitamins, and a nap every now and then and she is fine! I'll pray that you start getting your sweet Addison back soon!

  3. I honestly don't have any advice as I've never been a mo to a 4 year old but I will say my mom teaches 4 year olds all day and always talks about how the beginning of the year is so hard because their little bodies and brains are getting used to the change. Maybe give it a semester and if she is still having trouble make a decision from there? But on the same hand you have to do what your heart is telling you. So hard. Being a mommy is hard with all the decisions!!

  4. Yes, first, check for anemia. Jackson was the SAME way. We are both super low on iron, so he has vitamins daily for it!

    But second, give her some time. My Jackson is a SMART, FUN, SUPER AWESOME kiddo. He's an old soul. Always has been. VERY polite, has wonderful manners, a vocabulary to die for, and was mature for his age by the time he was 3. No lie. And I'm not saying any of this to brag--we had nothing to do with him being like this! He shocked us daily. But, giving you some background. He was a great kid. We never went through the terrible twos...we soared through the threes...THEN, we hit four. And holy hell, he became a mess. A hot mess. An angel at school: "Yes, ma'am. No thank you. Excuse me!" ...and then at home? "Get me this! Do that! NOOO! I'm not going to take a bath! I don't like my little brother! Leave me alone!" And the smart mouth on that child could have knocked me out of my shoes most days....

    That said, fours were HORRENDOUS for us. Now, he's 5. And guess what? It was like a switch. He's mature again, he's polite at school AND at home now...different kid. Their little bodies are changing and they are becoming BIG kids, and are expected so much away from home, that AT home, they have to let it all out. Being in school is GOOD for her, and she might just be a little more tired, but give her some time. Her attitude WILL come around. And she'll get used to the schedule and the energy level she needs for the day. I promise!! :) Hang in their momma! And just pray for patience--for you AND for her! :) Good luck!

  5. That is so tough to only 'get' to be around your kiddo when they are bears.

    we started homeschooling our two girls (ages 8 and 6) in January and we LOVE it. Not only do we get to spend all day together (which I thought I was crazy for even considering it at first) we get to have our very own schedule.

    Our home went from chaotic to cozy in a matter of a couple weeks.

    We actually just spent a long time praying about whether or not to keep Alyn (our youngest) in gymnastics for the 3 days a week and 2 hours a day 4-6pm... it was just too hard driving 25 miles there and back that often. God has been telling us to slow down (losing 2 laptops + lots of electronic goodies) and so we are just listening now. There were plenty of tears (including my own) but we know this is the best decision for our family.

    My advice... pray about it. He will make it very clear.



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