I'll be short and sweet tonight...since it is our anniversary....even though we do still have a baby awake....he's all messed up after our vacation. Anyways.....
Well my husband is officially unbelievable......in the best kind of way. 
So it's our 9 year anniversary, and as a gift, he got my year of writing published. 

Seriously. 
So it's sort of a long story and I'm still a little in shock, but it's so exciting! 
He started calling publishers at the beginning of the year to see if he could find someone who would be willing to publish it just as a gift. He talked to a lot of companies who just weren't interested. 
But then he talked to a company out of Dallas that was willing to do it. Brian made it clear that he wasn't looking for a book deal, he just wanted my year of writing published as a keepsake for us and our family and friends. 
They agreed on a price, and the process was started. 
Not too long after the original agreement had been made, the guy working on our project called Brian and asked if he thought I would be willing to do a book deal. He had been reading through my blog and formatting it into a manuscript, and told Brian that there was a big market for my writing style. 
But a book deal would mean giving up the rights to my content and a lot of other things, and Brian wasn't prepared to make that decision without my involvement. He figured if the guy was interested then, he would be interested later. 
So they continued on the process to formatting all 365 days into a manuscript. My mother-in-law edited every single day of writing (thank you Kay!), and Brian and the guy at the publishing company discussed everything from pictures, to paper quality, to the book cover. 
How cool is that? 
It's not done yet. Turns out 365 days of writing was a lot of content to format. The 1st copy will be done in mid to late August. From there, I'll be able to make any final edits or changes, and then it will go to print. We're only printing copies for our friends and family at this point, but who knows? Maybe one day I'll take that guy up on the book deal.  
I'm so excited, shocked, thrilled, in awe and thinking pretty highly of my hubby right about now. 
Anyways, we can chat more about it later, but I just had to share my exciting news! I can't wait for you to see it! 

Let's be changed by it

Today was a fairly normal day. 

I did the laundry. I tried to work through emails and facebook messages and reply to texts from so many of you wanting to help. A conference call, feeble attempts to work, playing power rangers with my 4 year old....today was a fairly normal day. 

But in the back of my mind, I thought constantly about the families who had no laundry to fold, no computers to answer emails on, no anything at all. 

The outpouring of love from people all over the world wanting to help Oklahomans affected by such terrible tragedy has been overwhelming. Specifically, those of you in our Scentsy family have nearly begged to help. Thank you!

Our community has a long road ahead. Even though we don't live in Moore, we live close. And we know so many people who have lost everything. 

But only 2 days after the tragedy, we have started to attempt to go back to our normal lives. We'll have to, but for those directly affected, "normal" is so very far away. 

I am asking that you'll stick with me and continue to hear stories and be changed by this tragedy. 

It would be much easier to pretend it didn't happen and return to life as normal. I think so much inside us wants to forget it quickly. 

But I've decided I don't want to forget. I want to be hurt by it, moved by it, changed by it. If we don't allow ourselves to be changed by it, how do we grow? 

But I also want to be around for the long hall. The rebuilding of this community is going to take a long time. Moore, Oklahoma and it's residents are going to need our support for a very long time.

Right now, we're raising money for 5 Scensty friends who lost their homes. Two of these families lost their 9 year old daughters as well. 

Our goal is to raise $10,000 to distribute to these families to help them get started getting back on their feet. 

If you can, please go to the website below and donate what you can. Every single dollar makes a difference. 

Thank you in advance for your generosity. Together we can show the love of Christ to so many. 

Click here to donate.

Humans are amazing

Today was hard.

There just aren't any other words to describe it.

The day started with my bible study group getting together to make a list of the people we knew who lost their homes.

The closest was a family member of someone in our group. So we set out to buy clothes for 4 littles boys to get them through the next week or so.

In the car, on the way to Wal-Mart, I made the comment that doing something was so much better than watching the news. The news was becoming too much to bear. I watched until 2:00 am last night just waiting for good news.

The good news came this morning when the news reported that 101 people were rescued during the night. Praise the Lord!

So I was beginning to feel better. We were out. We were actively helping. And that felt good.

And then I got a call from a dear friend who had the most horrific job today of being in the room with parents as they found out their children were confirmed dead. I can't even type it without tears running down my cheeks. I just can't imagine.

Ryan and Mike buried their daughter Ellie Kate in December, so they understand more than most what it's like to lose a child. It's not the same circumstances, but it's still the loss of a child. And most of us have no idea what that pain is like. We can only imagine, and our thoughts alone are terrifying and horrific.

But Ryan called me with a very specific assignment. One of the families they were able to minister to not only lost their daughter but also their home yesterday (as so many families who lost children did). This momma asked for an outfit to take to the funeral home tomorrow. Specifically, a shirt with a unicorn on it.

As soon as I heard from Ryan, I was on it. Ready to work and do whatever we could to make this happen for this family. I immediately contacted a friend of mine who has an embroidery shop to see if she could make a unicorn shirt.

Of course, she not only made 1, but she made several for this momma to choose from. And then it was the matter of a skirt. We needed to complete an outfit. Emily loved frilly skirts and tutus.

So many of you offered your time and money and talents to make sure Emily looks beautiful. At the end of the day, I picked up a perfect purple tutu and a gorgeous black petticoat (her favorite colors were purple and black). Two beautiful souls drove from Chickasha to Edmond to bring them to me.

And as I drove home in the midst of a beautiful evening in Oklahoma, I couldn't stop the tears.

And I sobbed and I wailed and I told God a thing or two about how I really feel about all this.

It all suddenly became too real.

And I wanted to argue. I wanted to yell. I wanted to say that it sucks.

And I said it. I told Him that I think this is horrible and not fair and horrific.

I told Him that I knew He could have saved them, but He didn't.

But He didn't.

And then through my tear filled eyes, I saw the sun break through the clouds as it began to set over the horizon, and I couldn't believe that it was only yesterday. It feels like a lifetime already.

And in that moment, it occurred to me, that if there is no pain, if there is no sorrow; If we never mourn and we never question and we never get angry....then we don't need Him at all.

But there is pain and there is sorrow. And we mourn and we question and we're mad about it. And it's not fair.

And I need Him.

And we need Him.

And in my rage and anger and sheer sorrow, He was so incredibly close.

I saw the hands and feet of Christ today so very very clearly. I watched as people full of sin and self righteousness, stepped out of their selfishness and gave freely of all they had.

Humans are amazing.

In the midst of our sin and imperfection there is something good that rises up that so desperately wants to give and serve and love.

In the hardest of times, at the core of who we are, we are so much like Christ.

It's when the day becomes monotonous and common that we stray from our spirits of giving and hope and love and become consumed with ourselves.

But in times of crisis we begin to act more like He who created us. And beautiful, beautiful things happen.

Today, I am proud to be a human, made in the image of God.

He is good in the midst of the bad. He is true when everything seems false. Sovereign always.

I heard Him whisper to me today that this is only a breath. Only a moment that we are here. There  is so much more that we don't understand or see.

I will not pretend to have all the answers. I don't. But I will reassure you that if you cry out to Him, if he seek Him, even if you get mad at Him, He will comfort you. He will reassure you. He will bring peace that only He can bring.

Father, tonight I pray that you would comfort those who seek you. Bring peace to the families who lost loved ones. Only you know their pain, Lord because you sent your only Son to die for us. And we are eternally grateful. Help us to trust you. Help us to find comfort and solace in your arms.

In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen.

What I've Learned.....365 Days Later

Tomorrow will be the 365th day of my writing journey.

It was a journey that I set out on simply because the Lord asked me to. And exactly one year later, I sit in front of the keys a very different person. 

I often wonder why the Lord would have me turn this "blog" into a personal journal....a day to day of our life and love. I often think that it was more for me than for anyone else. I have changed not only because of the words I have written but simply because I had to write them in the first place. 

I've had to pray. I've had to seek Him. I've had to question myself and every decision I've made over the past year. 

I don't know what He intended for you to see. Maybe it was one story, one day, one instance. 

Maybe it was me at my worst or me at my best. I don't know. 

I do know that there have been highs and lows. There have been hard days and there have been simply beautiful days. 

And through the process of it, 365 days later, I have fallen in love with the daily act of writing. Our story has leaked onto these pages in a very real and raw way with little editing and little time to consider or rewrite the words for the screen. Often written late at night at the end of a long day, the words you saw here were simply a reflection of my heart and my soul. Sometimes they were impressive. Other times they were not. 

Strangely enough, I am not looking towards tomorrow as another check on the list. I'm not even excited that it's over. I have come so accustomed to coming here everyday to share my soul, that I'm not sure I can stop. Yes, there have been many, many nights when it has been a burden, a mere obligation. But there have been many more nights when it has been nothing short of therapy. 

Sometimes, I wish this were some super cool blog that was insightful and thought out and informative and helpful. But it was never meant to be that. It was simply meant to be our story on a screen lived authentically for others to see. 

As I think back over all the stories and pictures that grace these pages, I can't help but smile. I'm so glad that I did, that I stuck it out and finished the race. 

And even though this daily writing journey may be coming to a close, I know that our journey with obedience to the Lord is really just beginning. 

I have begun to look at our life as one big adventure. I don't really know where we'll be or what we'll be doing a year from now, and I am perfectly okay with that. As long as we're seeking after the Lord and following Him wherever He may lead us, I know that the story will turn out good. 

I honestly feel like one small chapter is closing and another, much bigger chapter, is opening with blank pages to be filled. 

There is so much more story to be written. 

How do I thank you for walking this journey with me? There have been tears shed and laughter shared for sure. But you have read on as devoted followers. You have become so much a part of our lives. You come up to us at events and on trips to tell us that you've been reading and following. And I am always humbled and honored that the Lord would use someone like me to reach so many people. I know that He has used my words to touch each of you in the right moment at the right time. 

Not everything has moved you. I'm sure lots of it has nearly bored you to tears. But I know the Lord has had His hand on the things you have read and the ways you have been touched and I am so grateful that it was not all in vain. 

Regardless of how long you've been along for the ride or what brought you here, thank you. Thank you for being a safe place. Thank you for challenging me. Thank you for encouraging me. I am different 365 days later because of you. 

.....day 364 of a year of writing.....

When There is Nothing Left....

I start typing tonight with a heavy heart that is somehow full of hope. Our dear friends, Tony and Rachel Cobb and their two children, Tobin who is five, and Caroline who is three, lost their home and everything in it today in an Oklahoma fire.
Rachel is a stay-at-home mom and Scentsy Superstar Consultant and Tony is the youth pastor at our church, Lifechurch.tv in Edmond.

My first reaction was utter disbelief. You just don't think anything like that is ever going to happen, especially to people you know and love.

But my second reaction was one of hope and faith. I know that the Lord has just been given the biggest opportunity to show off for this family. Their babies are going to see God do things that they may never have witnessed in a lifetime.

I think my heart of hope came from a beautiful prayer I read in my quiet time this morning. I'm studying the book of Nehemiah and have been struck by the beauty of this prayer of thanksgiving and reminders of the promises the Lord has made to us and all the great miracles He has performed for us. If you have a few minutes, click here to read it. It's not long. I promise. And it's beautiful.

The most beautiful part is that it's the Lord's promise to us as believers. No matter how far we stray. No matter what we do wrong, He is compassionate and merciful, and He will not forget us. He has proven that time and time again to us through our ancestors. He is always faithful to us.

Then the more I prayed for the Cobbs and their situation, the more the Lord continued to put this promise on my heart and mind:

But now, this is what the Lord says—
He who created you, Jacob,
He who formed you, Israel:
"Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.

2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.

3 For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cusht and Seba in your stead.

4 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give people in exchange for you,
nations in exchange for your life.

5 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will bring your children from the east
and gather you from the west.

6 I will say to the north, 'Give them up!'
and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.'
Bring My sons from afar
and My daughters from the ends of the earth—

7 everyone who is called by My name,
whom I created for My glory,
whom I formed and made. Isaiah 43:1-7

This is the Lord's promise not only for the Cobbs but for each of us as believers. You are His. His is with you! He loves you and He will defend you! 

Just as He will defend the Cobb family. 

This is a great opportunity for us to show this incredible family the love of Christ. If you can donate anything, it would be greatly appreciated. Money, clothes, resources, etc. They literally have nothing. 

Tobin, their son, wears a 5/6 and Caroline, their sweet princess, wears a 3T. I also know that Rachel and Tony will need clothes but I'm not sure what sizes they need. I'll update on Facebook as I learn more. 

If you live in the Oklahoma City area, there will be a group collecting donations on Saturday morning at 10:00 a.m. at the Stars and Stripes Park west of the baseball fields. Call or text 496-5891 if you can't find them. If you would like to send money or items via the mail, please email me at allisondalke@gmail.com. Anything or any amount will be a blessing to this family. 

Let's be the hands and feet of Christ. If you can't give in a monetary way or through donations, please consider sending the Cobbs a message of encouragement via facebook. 

Thankful for so much tonight.....

.....day 357 of a year of writing.....

Bragging On My Man

How do I begin to describe him? How do I even start to explain to you what he is to me? He is so incredibly different than I am. We're really from two different worlds....two worlds that would become one.

I didn't know how he would change. I didn't know that the Lord would use him to lead me, comfort me, support me, and love me.

I don't know how I ended up with him. I sure didn't deserve him. Yes, he drives me crazy (as I equally drive him crazy I'm sure), but oh, how I love him.

I consider myself nothing more than blessed to have the kind of relationship that I do with my husband. We don't always agree, and anyone who lived with us when we were first married (three of our sisters) would probably undoubtedly tell you that they didn't think we would make it.

We are both incredibly stubborn, strong-willed, and head strong. Are those all the same things? I think so, but it's what we are for sure. And somehow it works.

He is my rock, my supporter, my leader, my sounding board.....he's my man.

I've been thinking lately about how much he puts up with. He goes with just about any idea I throw at him. This entire foster care thing was an idea I threw his way, and he never once told me I was crazy. He just went with it. We prayed about it and believed God would lead us in the right direction.

Today he took the babies to their supervised visit with their biological mom and dad. It was the first time for him to meet the dad. I am almost glad I wasn't there. Actually, I'm really glad I wasn't there.

The babies wanted to stay with Brian. They didn't want their mom or dad at first. I guess we should have known that would happen and will probably only get worse. He said it was awkward and that he felt bad. These are their babies that are choosing him over their momma and daddy.

Brian wants to build a relationship with the dad (and the mom of course). As do I. It's hard though. How do we say, "Hey, we want to be mentors to you and show you what it looks like to be good parents?" I mean that conversation does not bode well with anyone. We both know this is going to be a process. I'm blessed and honored to walk this crazy road with a man who I know only wants what's best for everyone.

He wants these babies to have the best future that they possibly can. I couldn't ask for a better man.

Just a little bragging on my man today.

 .....day 193 of a year of writing.....

Your Story

You stopped me over and over again in June at Scentsy's Magical Memories Trip in Disney World to tell me that you were reading this blog. You told me how it had changed you, moved you, inspired you, and I was in shock. You just kept coming.

So every night I sit down to type the words that are swirling around in my head because I know that God asked me to do it.

There are many nights that I think I have nothing of value to say. There are many nights that I'm honestly too tired to write. But somehow, night after night, words appear here and you read them over there.

And apparently it matters.

It happened again this week. You shared your stories with me. Stories that centered around you reading this blog.

And on Thursday night when everyone else was celebrating after a beautiful dinner and amazing fire show, all I wanted to do was drop to me knees in humbled adoration of how incredibly cool our God is.

You found me on that 1st day at the resort. You came to me to tell me that you read my blog occasionally, and that you'd love to talk later.

You had tears in your eyes. I promised we'd talk.

I never stopped thinking about you.

And on that last night at the resort, we couldn't find seats at the party, so we ate on the balcony of Jacquleyn's suite. Suddenly I wanted to go look for someone (I didn't think it was you, but God knew I would find you.)

Almost everyone had left. There were a few people near the stage taking pictures, and as I looked for my friend, there you were.

And we sat down to talk. A talk I will never forget.

You told me that your goal this year to put the Lord 1st in your life. You told me that you hear people talk about how much they love Him, but that you don't get it.

You believe, you go to church, but you know there is more.

I agreed. There is more.

There is more than believing. There is falling in love.

I told you to read Crazy Love by Frances Chan.

You promised to get it right away.

You told me that you know you have to seek Him this year. You want to love Him.

We talked about prayer. About praying unceasingly. We talked about what a relationship with God really looks like in day to day life.

You told me that this blog had made you want to be a better Christian.

We talked and we talked and we talked. And looking back, there is more I wish I would have said.

I wish I would have reminded you that His grace is all you need. He is always near you, no matter how you currently feel about Him or how much you've neglected Him. He never leaves you; never forsakes you.

You cried. I cried. And I remember thinking how much I wish I could just bring you into my living room on a Tuesday morning to see a ton of women who have been through it all and who love the Lord like you want to love Him.

I promised to keep in touch. I promised to follow up.

We hugged. A good hug. One where both people know exactly why their hugging the other person.

And I walked away from that conversation feeling so incredibly unworthy.

Tears filled my eyes. There was no stopping them.

When I least expected it, in a setting where I would never think it would happen, we talked about the love of Christ and the desires of our heart.

He used these words to make a difference.

I felt incredibly small. In that instant I realized that I am just a piece of this very huge puzzle.

Brian could see that the moment was big. I wanted to walk far far away from everyone else and drop to my knees, but he brought me back to a quiet balcony and held me while I wept.

Tears of joy, of fear, of sorrow, of longing, of hope.

Tears that spilled over with unworthiness.

I looked up at him and said, "I don't understand why He would use me." I don't know how to do this. I don't know what to say.

Brian proceeded to hold me and pray. A prayer of thanksgiving to a God who loves us so much sometimes it hurts. He prayed a pray of peace over us and over you.

Sometimes are lives are about so much more than we believe them to be. There is a big picture that we often forget about too easily. There is always more at work than we can see.

I told Brian that night that if your life is the only one changed by these words. If your relationship with the Lord is the only one that grows stronger because of this, then every day, and every post, and every word would be worth it.

He agreed. But then he said, "do you really think he'd stop at only 1?"

I never know what will come out of my heart or my mind or my soul onto this page. All I can do is pray that God uses the words that end up here to make a difference in your life or the life of someone you know.

Thank you for your story.

I'm not giving up on you. I want you to fall in love with the God of the universe just like I have. I want you to be so crazy about Him that you can't shut-up about Him. Who knows....maybe if you stick around here long enough, it'll happen to you too.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

 Matthew 11:28 

"Blessed are those who hunger and search for righteousness, for they will be filled."

Matthew 5:6

.....day 154 of a year of writing.....

Write

When I log into blogger everyday to write a post, I have to click on this little orange pencil shaped button. I guess it's like the equivalent to picking up a pencil. I'm not sure, but I guess it's close.

The only difference is everyday when I come here to write, I'm not just writing for myself. I'm writing words that other people will read.

Occasionally, that gets daunting.

What will I say? Who the heck will care? What will people think about who I really am?

And the amazing thing is, over the past 100+ days of this journey of writing every day for a year, I have discovered that you like me best when I write to you like I would write to my best friend.

It's not always politically correct or even thought out. It's more often than not, simply the words that are laying on my heart.

And I have to thank you for that.

Thank you for loving what's real even when it's not pretty.

Thank you for appreciating truth even when it's hard to hear.

And thank you for walking this journey with me.....this journey of growing closer to God and the call He has on my life.

This blog was created when I first started listening to Him. When I first became aware that He had something to say to me.

One of the first things He told me to do was write. Then He told me to write everyday. That turned into A Post a Day in March, April, and May. I thought I was officially crazy. I really doubted whether or not I could do it. Everyday?

But I did it. And it changed me.

Oh, and it challenged me. Those of you who have been around since the beginning will remember this: Clearing Things Up. Almost immediately my faith was challenged. But, oh, what a journey that was!

And when I stopped writing after that three months, I missed it.

Before I knew it I was committing to writing every day for a year.

And now here we are, 123 days into that year, and I can't help but think about all the things He's put before us. All the changes He's made in our lives.

And I just want to thank you. So sincerely.

Thank you for letting me be exactly who I am in these words.

I never feel like I have to hide what I really feel or change the way I think about things. You take me as I am...imperfect, full of faults, starting over everyday.....and you love me anyway.

Your words of encouragement, your Facebook posts and messages, are just what I need sometimes to keep doing this.

I can't help but grin from ear to ear when I read that one (or more) of you were touched or moved or convicted by something I wrote here.

Our God is so very good. He uses everyday people like me and you to build each other up and make us even greater for His kingdom.

Thank you for allowing me to live my life just as it comes right here on this page. You are a true blessing to me.

Thank you for letting me Write.

.....day 123 of a year of writing.....

An Auction to Remember

My daughter, Addison, has the wonderful opportunity to attend a school like no other. It really is unbelievable.

Every morning begins with 53 kiddos treading through the dew covered grass to pick up horse and llama poop. Then they have to feed the animals (including the ducks!).

Inside the giant house these kids call school, are classrooms that make you want to snuggle up and read a book. Music and art are a part of everyday life at her school.

But, it takes a lot of money to run schools like this.

Tonight was Keystone's annual KickstART. It's a fundraiser to raise money to help this school run. Since they've decided to do things their own way, there is no federal funding. It all comes from parents, donors, teachers, and fundraisers like tonight.

Brian and I took my mom and my sister and her fiancée. We had a fabulous time.

We had a wonderful time at the live auction and then proceeded to dance the night away. My sister shut the place down!

It was a ball.

One of the auction items that I had my eye on was a bird that the five kids in Addison's class created (yes, I said five kids). There are only five kids in her class. I told you it was a dream!

The kids were each given a section of canvas with instructions to paint within the lines. Addy was given the head and the upper wing. I feel in love with this when I saw it.

First of all, it's incredible that 4 and 5 year olds did this!

But to know that Addy worked on it, I had to have it.

But I was outbid! Desmond Mason and his wife Andrea were there, and she loved the painting.

Desmond played for the NBA for 10 years and now is extremely active in the community. Andrea is the owner of a workout facility in OKC that incorporates pilates, yoga, and ballet into one workout called Barre3 which I am totally checking out after tonight.

After the bidding was over, my amazing husband went up to Desmond and asked him if we could buy the painting from them. His wife found out that I wanted it because our daughter worked on it, and she came and found me to tell me it was ours. They were so incredibly sweet!

So tonight, I am extremely grateful to have beautiful Scissortail Flycatcher in my house that I know Addy will be so excited to see when she wakes up in the morning.

I'm grateful for art, generosity, and the beauty of creating. And I am so extremely grateful that Addison has the opportunity to learn and grow in an environment where she can be exactly who she is.

.....day 29 of a year of writing.....

And Still We Remain

We're as different as they come. Night and day really.

She's a mess; I'm a neat freak. She loves math; I not only dislike it, I despise it. She was the level-headed one in high school; I was the the one making all the bad decisions. She played basketball; I was a cheerleader. She remembers everything; I remember nothing. (Thank goodness she remembers it all otherwise I'd have no recollection of high school at all.)

How we ended up as best friends is hard to say.

Our friendship started long before we fell for the same guy or played hooky during 5th hour only to get caught. She is the first friend I ever remember having.

One of my earliest memories is a painful one. Because she lived out in the country, she was going to have to switch schools. We were in first grade and my world fell apart. What would I do without her?

Turns out we wouldn't be in the same school again until high school, but our friendship would magically endure through those childhood and pre-adolescent years.

Then we would spend most of our high school English classes together passing notes, making up secret languages, driving to lunch, and living for Friday night football games.

She knows me better than anyone. She knows the good and the bad. The triumphs and the shattering mistakes. And she loves me anyway. She knows my past, and she knows all of it.

And still we remain.

Far apart in distance. We never talk on the phone. The words I write here are more often than not, simply for her. A note written to a friend who knows and understands me the way that I am.

Nothing has ever been able to change our relationship. Not time, not money, not distance, not even broken trust.

And still we remain.

This weekend I got a piece of her for a couple of days when she and her hubby and their handsome 2-year-old came to stay.

It still amazes me that nothing ever changes with us. There is no catch up necessary. It's like everything is simply understood.

And I love it.

What a blessing to know someone who knows you better than you know yourself.

.....day 26 of a year of writing.....

Don't forget you have until tomorrow to have a chance to win our Labor Day Giveaway! For all the juicy details, click here: Labor Day Giveaway.

Asking for Help

I like to think I can do it all. I usually try to do it all, actually. But there are days when we undeniably need other people.

I have been so incredibly blessed by my women's small group. These women have become everything to me. Today I had to call on a couple of them to come to my rescue.

My Scentsy team meeting was scheduled for this morning, and we had a horrible night last night with Luke, our 2-year-old. He was up almost every hour crying uncontrollably.

It was awful for everyone involved, especially Luke. Usually if we have an event interfere with one of our kids, either Brian or I take care of the kiddos while the other one goes to fulfill our obligation.

But this morning that plan wasn't going to work. Brian was on his way to Missouri to pick up a car he bought online. I was by myself with the kids. Luke cried non-stop for most of the morning.

What to do?

I called Jacquelyn, my fabulous sister-in-law, to see if there was anyway she could get dressed and leave her house in less than an hour to come host my team meeting.

And of course she agreed. Amy Marc-Charles also showed up to help and save the day. How grateful I am.

It's more than great to have other women you can call on in a time of need. And although there is nothing I hate more than inconveniencing someone to make my life easier, sometimes we all need help.

Rejoice in the Lord Always

Okay so a couple things first....

1. It has been too long since I've written, and I think the lack of writing is attempting to make me a crazy person!

2. I have had this post written for a long time, and I have no idea why it hasn't yet been posted, so here you go.

3. For more information about NKH, Hope Link, or Newborn Screening, check out the websites below:

• http://www.okchopelink.org
• http://www.savebabies.org/
• http://www.nkh-network.org

From June 10, 2011
Today was beautiful.

What once crushed my spirit and made me question my faith now envelopes my soul and covers my doubt like a warm comforting blanket.

Oh how full my heart is today. What a blessing to be able to love on and pray over NKH babies from all over the country at this year's national NKH conference held in Oklahoma City.

What once made me so mad and frustrated at God, now makes me want to put my face to the floor and worship Him for His grace. I believe that one of the things that made me fall so in love with God is a beautiful little girl named Ellie Kate.

My heart and soul have questioned, pondered, been angry with and worshiped a God who would use a sweet baby girl to bring people to Jesus. Ellie Kate has made me kingdom minded more than any other person or circumstance in my life. She has challenged me and made me grow.

I am beginning to accept that I will never be able to understand all that God does. I will never understand the suffering, pain, tears, sorrow, questioning, joy, beauty, laughter, and love of raising an NKH baby, but I do know that when I finally see God's face and kneel at His feet, I will understand in an instant what I can't begin to fathom or explain now. And although I don't like not understanding, I know that it is part of walking by faith.

I know that God has His hand in ALL things for the goodness of His kingdom. I know He is just, and I know He is enough.

We so often become caught up in our world (this earth and all the happenings on it) that we forget as Christ followers that our real concern should be bringing more people to know Christ.

How do we show as many people as possible how to fall in love with a man who loves us more than life? Jesus, who died for us! How do we bring more people to His feet?

Do I believe that these precious babies are here to bring people to Christ?

I'm not sure. I'm still okay not knowing all the answers. These precious babies were no mistake on God's part. They were wonderfully made for the work of His kingdom.

For you created my inmost being,

you knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful,

I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you

when I was made in the secret place.

When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

your eyes saw my unformed body, 

All the days ordained for me

were written in your book 

before one of them came to be.

Psalms 137:13-16 

All I really is know is the change that Ellie Kate has made in me. She transformed me. She took me from lukewarm to on fire.

Ellie Kate made me question God. She made me mad at God. And then she helped me fall so deeply in love with my God that I can't wait for the day that I get to thank her for changing me.

For years I prayed to be "on fire" for God. I wanted a love that I would HAVE to share, that I wouldn't be able to contain, and then that love came from something I tried so hard to stay away from.

I don't watch the news. I don't want to hear about pain or suffering. I am the type of person who would rather just pretend that all is well in the world...or at least I used to be...

Until the McLaughlins slipped into my life like a late night storm and changed everything. They turned my world upside down.

What a blessing to know an angel. Oh, how she melts my heart! Just writing these words about Ellie Kate, brings a smile to my face that sends joy down my spine. I am so in love.

How will I ever thank this sweet baby for the change she made in me?

How will I ever have the right words to tell her how she changed my life and my eternity and possibly the future of my family?

One day I'll see her in heaven in perfect form. In the place that she was made for. And I'll be able to tell her...I'll be able to tell her....(oh the tears!)

She makes me want to work the rest of my life to bring people to know the Jesus I love and am in love with because of a precious NKH baby who changed my view of life, death, love, and Christ

And Ellie Kate, I promise to do it all for you.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

Rejoicing in the Lord always....

The Day I Let Go of Control

I am somewhat of a control freak....okay to be more precise, I am very mush of a control freak. I like to know what's going on. I like to know who is doing what.

I like lists and schedules and plans and more lists. And I like to be the one calling the shots.

Over the past couple months I have experimented with letting go of control. Since our Scentsy adventure began, we have hosted many large training events. Some we good, some not so good, and some have been great.

We learned something from all of them, and I have always been in control.

A couple months ago, I asked my dear friend and fellow SuperStar director, Jana Holcomb if she would want to take over complete responsibility of our upcoming training event, and she said yes.

Krystal, Nicole, myself and Luke, Jana, and Jenn in Canada on a Scentsy trip. 

Our first committee meeting was a little tough for me. It's hard for me to not be in charge. It's not because I'm bossy (even though I am a little bit). It's not because I think I'm the best at being in control. I think it's just because I've always been the one in control when it comes to Scentsy.

But Jana was a natural, and before I knew it, she was telling me what to do instead of me telling her what to do. It was great!

Jana and I in Mexico at a Scentsy Leadership retreat

A couple weeks before the event, I think she started to feel the work behind it all. All the little things start to add up, and you find that you have lots to do all at once. But she handled it all stress free and with grace.

Even when she came down with a serious cold the week before the event, she didn't stress.

me and Jana at a Scentsy convention in Denver last year

It has been a fun journey watching Jana grow. I've seen something shift in her in the past few months, and it's been fun to watch. There is a peace about her. She doesn't sweat the small things, and she sees a much bigger purpose for her life than she did before.

Krystal, myself, Steven, Jana, Matt, Jacquelyn, and Brian in Hawaii on a Scentsy incentive trip.

It is truly incredible to watch your friends living in the will of God. I know Jana is doing just that.

The event went off without a hitch. The day was full of wonderful speakers, great information, and lots of inspiration. I have pages of notes (just to prove that you can never know everything about this business and there is always something to learn!)

We raised over $4,000 for an amazing organization called Anna's House Foundation. You can read more about Anna's house by going to their website at http://annashousefoundation.org/. Because Jana and Steven very recently adopted Audrey, this organization pulls tight on their heart strings, as it did on everyone else's this past Saturday. We were all moved by this organization's commitment to proving loving, stable, Christian homes to foster children in need of love and hope.

On a Scentsy Leadership cruise in the Bahamas 

The day was great. And the best part for me was being able to see one of my very best friends, stand on stage at the end of the day and remind us all why Scentsy can be "our thing." We can do it our way and be successful but only when we stop comparing ourselves and stop worrying about what we can't do and instead start doing the things that we can do.

Jana and Luke in our backyard. 

So Jana, thank you for a job well done. Actually thank you for a job amazingly done. I am very proud of you my friend, and I can honestly say that I don't believe I could have done it better myself.

Tonight I'm turning in early

Today was a great day. Today we held a training event for over 300 small business owners. Today I walked away with new ideas and inspiration.

Today 300 people raised over $4,000 for Anna's House Foundation (read tomorrow for all the details).

Today was a great day. And tonight I'm turning in early.

I want you to have all the great details, but I don't have the energy now to do it justice. Tune in tomorrow to read all about a great day.

Thankful

Tonight I'm thankful for a wonderful company that brought my family so close together and for the amazing women that I love and have amazing relationships with.

I got to spend tonight with 3 of my sister-in-laws who I love as much as my own flesh and blood sister because of Scentsy. I have to wonder if we would ever have had the relationship we have without our association with Scentsy.

I don't think I could love Jacquelyn, Kristi, and Kathleen more even if we had grown up together. They are 3 of my best friends and always will be. I look up to them, respect them, and am so proud of each of them.

I'm also thankful that Scentsy has brought my mom and I closer. I never would have imagined the relationship we would grow from being able to "work" together.

I'm just thankful tonight for the amazingly strong and influential women in my life. Sometimes we all need to stop and recognize those we love, and spend some much needed time with them which is exactly what we're doing!

Until there's more,
Allison


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