I realize the title of this post is pushing some of you over the edge. I know, you may not even know what a laminator is. Remember how your 6th grade teacher had cool pictures printed on paper that felt like plastic? That's what a laminator does! It makes paper feel like plastic! 

I'm 100% sure that is not at all a technical definition of a laminator, but who cares? That's basically what it does, so let's call it good. 

More on the laminator in a bit....

Before we get to that, I feel like I should ask you how you've been....really...How are you? I don't know because I'm not on social media. (By the way, my absence from social media saved you from seeing about 15 pictures of my new laminator tonight. You are welcome.) 

Isn't that strange? I really feel like I don't know what's happening with you people because I'm unplugged. But I will also say that my social media absence has been amazing. It was admittedly hard at the beginning. I was addicted for sure. But it is so much easier now. I mean, it sort of feels like freedom. (I am promising to explain that better later.) 

I also feel like I should admit that I am not in a very disciplined place at the moment, and I am perfectly okay with that (for now). 

If you've been reading for any amount of time, you may have noticed that I have a tendency to be too hard on myself. I hold myself to a high standard on most days and make myself feel bad when I don't live up to my own high expectations. I am learning to chill out. 

I'm currently not on a regular workout routine. I'm not being disciplined about having my quiet time in the morning with the Lord. I'm not being disciplined about what I eat or when I go to bed. It's not normal for me, but it's okay. 

I am finally in my groove in terms of being a homeschool momma. I've found fun, themed curriculum on teacherspayteachers.com and I'm staying up late on a regular basis printing fun lessons and then laminating them. What can I say? I'm a teacher at heart. Always have been.

I feel the tug on my heart to get back into a rhythm.....to run again.....to study again....to read again. I guess you could say I've been a little lazy for a season. And for the 1st time ever, I don't feel guilty about it. I'm okay with it. 

My soul yearns for discipline and structure and order, but sometimes it's okay to wander a bit.....to stray off the straight and narrow and remember why I like it better there. I don't really know what I'm getting at here. Just processing. Writing on the screen. Attempting to unravel my brain. 

It's the way things happen often. Sometimes I just need to write. {Sorry to bother you with the inside of my head.}

On another note, (that's my lame way of transitioning from the previous section that made no sense whatsoever and may even be contradictory) I have fully embraced my Whitney English Day Designer agenda, and I can't wait to start using it. I even emailed them yesterday to see if they had any 2013 editions left (they don't). I think I'm going to like it.  

If you missed the last post, be sure to check it out here for a chance to win a planner. 

I thought you might also like to see what we've been doing lately since I've vanished from Instagram. Just a little school outside because we've having the most gorgeous Oklahoma fall weather around here. 

Oh and my neighbor just started homeschooling this week! How crazy is that?! They moved into the house next to us right before school started. They have 3 kiddos and one of them is a little girl that's in 1st grade. Of course our kiddos have become instant friends (which I love). But she decided this week that homeschool was the best option for them too. 

She came over this morning and we talked curriculum and theory and approach all morning long, and it felt so good. I feel like this Fall is full of blessings and harvest from the Lord. I really do. 

Other news in the Dalke house inclues Wyatt brushing his own hair. 

Personally, it's a little too Ace Ventura for my style, but hey, he's cute and can rock anything. 

Oh and I discovered Teacherspayteachers, bought a $30 laminator from amazon, and started laminating everything in sight. 

I don't know if that makes me crazy or fun. Either way....happy Thursday. 

A short trip for mom

I'm moments away from heading out the door and up the highway to hear Mrs. Beth Moore teach at Living Proof Live tonight. 

It's always hard to leave....even for a night. There is a bit of guilt and a moment when I think I need to make up some excuse not to go. But then I remember, that it's okay to take some time off, and it's okay to get away for a bit. 

I am extremely tempted to take curriculum with me to lesson plan for school and my computer to do who knows what, but I think I've decided I'm leaving it all here. It's only 24 hours....sometimes we just need to walk away. 

So that's what I'm doing. Packing up, and getting away. Just for a minute....but it'll be wonderful. 

I can't wait to hear what Mrs. Beth has for us. I know the Lord will use her to speak to each of us in the most personal way, and I can't wait to hear it.  

I'm sure you'll hear all about it tomorrow......

Desperate

So I know I haven't had a lot to write about lately. A few good ideas here and there, but mostly fluff. I think it's because i'm in the process of changing a few things....my routines, my heart, my focus. All things that I'm sure I'll be ready to write about soon enough. 

I've been thinking a lot and questioning everything. 

I desperately don't want to our lives to look like the world. I can't decide if this was all spurred by Miley Cyrus' performance on the VMA's or not, but it's a possibility. 

I want my life to be full of Christ and full of these little people, and I don't want a whole lot else. 

I don't want to live in fear. It always has a way of creeping into our lives, and I desperately don't want any part of it. 

Can you tell I'm desperate? Desperate for Christ. Desperate for God's word and truth and abundant life. 

Desperate for Jesus and all he is. Light, truth, grace, mercy, peace, joy, life. I want all that. 

But that might mean that we make some decisions to live life differently. Maybe we make some decisions to ensure we have a Christ centered home. Maybe that's exactly what we need. 

And maybe we lay it all at the cross. Lay it all down in surrender to Christ. 

from "Becoming Myself" by Stasi Eldredge....on fear.....

Laying down what we want to protect or are afraid of losing or are terrified we will never have is not the same thing as losing those things. It is surrendering them. It is opening up or clenched hand around them and allowing God access to them and to us. It is actually saying yes to God for them. Yes to his plan. Yes to his way. It is believing that just as his ways are higher than the heavens are above the earth, so his way for the things we fear is higher. This God of ours is a God of life, of goodness. He is the God of the Resurrection. We lay down our fear. We pick up Jesus. He is the only way we can live beyond fear. He is the Way.

And I am desperate for Him.

Sweet Whispers

I watch his tiny chubby fingers as he rubs them against his lovey. His eyelids are heavy from the day. He's so busy all day long. Exploring, learning, trying new things. 

But now, in this moment, snuggled up against my chest, he is still. Not busy, not moving, just rocking in his momma's arms. 

My heart beat slows as he calms into my breath. We both relax into each other. The fan gently moves his baby soft hair back and forth, and my soul swells with love. 

Having a 9 month old who is crawling and exploring and busy means being a busy busy momma. And sometimes the days are long, but my time with him as a baby is so short. 

And at the end of the day, as I rock my sweet baby to sleep, I'm overwhelmed by the sweet whispers of the Lord as He reminds me that at the end of a busy day, sometimes all I need is to relax into His arms. 

In the midst of my movement and to do lists and good intentions, He loves me. But I have to slow down and be still and rest in Him to really feel it sometimes. 

I look at my sweet sleeping baby and am reminded that the Lord looks at me the same way. His love for us is overwhelming and it covers us just like our love for our children covers them. 

Thank you Lord for using these precious moments with my loves to remind me of and help me understand your love for me. Thank you for your grace and your sweet whispers. 

Clean Laundry and 4 bathrooms.....now that's Vacation

I don't remember if I told you or not, but when we came to Colorado for a week, we rented a 4 bedroom house through vrbo.com (vacation rental by owner). I think technically we ended up renting it directly through the management company because we were able to make an offer on the house instead of just paying the price they had listed per week. 
Since having kids, we have used rental homes frequently when we travel. And we can often get a house cheaper than we can get a 2 bedroom hotel room (which is really what you need for a family of 5). 
For example, Brian was able to make an offer on this house, and we ended up paying $250 a night. And this place is huge. It would sleep 15 people if you wanted it to. It's incredible, and it has made our traveling experience so much easier. Plus we have saved a ton of money on food cost since we have a real kitchen. 

We have cooked most of our meals. We have washed clothes every night. There is free wifi, a private hot tub, a back yard, a fireplace, a garage, satellite TV, and maybe most importantly, there are 4 bathrooms in this house. And the view from the back porch is something I could definitely get used to waking up to. 

Anyways, as I am packing up all the junk we managed to fit into our car and then spread all over this house, I was wondering if you ever do the same thing. Or are you a hotel junkie? 

If you've never looked into renting a vacation rental, I think you'd be surprised at what you can get for your money. 

And when you stay in a house, you get to take suitcases full of clean clothes home instead of plastic bags full of dirty ones. Oh, and you can invite your entire family to join you on vacation if it happens to work out that way. 

More about our adventures today later this week......

Heaven in the Mountains

This must be what Heaven is like. 

Untouched, unexplainable, breathtaking. 

I will admit to being a total beach bum. I see God in the waves with my toes covered by the movement of the surf. Always have. Always will. My soul is always well near the sound of the waves. 

But today I saw God in the mountains. 

Brian and Chad took us up to "the cabin" where they spend 2 weeks every October elk hunting. To get there, we had to travel over 3,000 feet up into the mountains. We stopped at Cottonwood Pass to snap a picture before heading onto a long, wet, dirt road that isn't even open all year round because it gets too snow covered to pass.  

Once we got to the cabin, I understood what all the fuss was about. 
This is the view from the cabin's deck.....

With a view like this, why would you ever leave? 
And then there were dozens of these guys buzzing around everywhere. I have never seen so many hummingbirds in my life. And if you follow me on instagram, sorry for the 3 videos of hummingbirds. I was obviously impressed. 

We saw a deer when we were walking next door. Just hanging out by the road. Completely unscathed by our presence. 

This guy was happy. 

These little people were happy. 

And I fell in love with a 1 bedroom cabin with a view. 

But there was more they wanted to show us. 

We jumped back in the car and headed to the Trading Post and the one restaurant around to grab some lunch. Of course we ate in a log cabin. 

After lunch we headed to Tin Cup (about a 10 minute drive) where only 2 families stay through the winter every year because it gets that cold and there are no real roads. This is undeveloped beauty, people. It was all amazing. (Not saying I would ever live here in the winter. But I am saying it's awesome in the summer). 

We came to see this. 

And let the kids do this.

And catch these. 

On our way out of Tin Cup, we had to stop to see this through the lens. This is by far, my favorite shot from today. And for the record, I haven't edited a single one of these pictures. 1. Because I don't know how, and 2. because they don't need it. 

Every time we drove somewhere new, I was captivated. Truly unbelievable glory abounded. Beauty surrounded us in every direction, every place we turned. 

After our trip to Taylor Park (where we ate lunch) and Tin Cup (where we fed and caught trout) and the dam (where we watched the river flow while the kids threw rocks, the dads threw the fly fishing rode for a while, and we basked in the beauty of our surroundings), we headed back to the cabin where the hummingbirds came out in full glory. 

Well, these might be my favorite pictures too. And I have so many more.....I might do an entire post on hummingbirds. Who knows? 

I took Wyatt into the cabin to crawl around a little bit and explore. He was a great traveler today. 

When it was time to leave the cabin, we headed to what Brian and Chad call 3 mile. It's just a dirt road on mile marker 3 that they hunt at in the winter. And we saw all this along the way. 

All the big kids rode in the jeep with Tamara and Chad while Brian, Wyatt, and I followed behind. 

And then it was time to say goodbye. There were tears (from Tamara, of course). 

And a couple of man hugs. 

The next time they see each other, they will be here. In the midst of this beauty and splendor. And I will be jealous for the 1st time. 

Because today I saw Heaven in the mountains. And tonight, all is well with my soul.