A year without social media.....

I have been off for a while. I made a commitment to myself a long time ago to write every single day, but there has been something wrong for a couple weeks. I haven't been able to put my finger on it. I just couldn't nail down what it was. 

So I didn't write. 

It turns out that sometimes the Lord takes away my words so He can plant words in my heart. Words that matter and that may actually make a difference. 

I started wondering, in all my silence, if maybe I just wasn't supposed to write in this season. 

There are lots of reasons I write. One of the main reasons being that I've come to love it. The words on this screen have caused me to reflect and grow and change, and I love that. In addition to that, our days have been documented. The good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful....all of it, and no one can take that away. The Lord's goodness is beautifully woven through our story, and I can visually see it if I go back and look. Plus I sort of have the absolute worst memory of anyone I know. Words help me remember. 

The longer I prayed about it, I knew it wasn't the writing. There was something that needed to change but it wasn't this. 

This morning the Lord put this crazy idea in my mind while I was getting ready for church. An idea that I thought was crazy and unnecessary and probably wouldn't happen. 

There's no way I could do that. 

It was an idea that became a full fledged mission throughout the day. I kept pulling out my notebook to write words and ideas and questions. 

Questions like: 

Are we looking for someone to want us and like us and even adore us through social media? 

Has social media really just made life more complicated instead of more simple? 

Has social media become an idol but I pretend that it's not?

How much more time would I have if I just walked away from social media? 

And I started wondering if any of those things were true.

The things I think as I browse the newsfeed....are they good things?  Or is there fear and anxiety and doubt and comparison?

There are forms of social media that I like more than others. I'm a lover of instagram. Seriously love it. I only follow people that inspire me or make me want to be better. Facebook pretty much makes me crazy, and I hardly ever tweet. I'v been wrapped up in all of them at some point or another.

But the question becomes...am I better because of it? Is my family better because of it?

I don't think we are.

I think I'm distracted and disengaged and far too "connected" to the rest of the world.

Isn't social media just a tool that attempts to fulfill our natural desire for community. We do want to be needed and loved and adored, and as women, those desires are innately a part of who God created us to be. But those desires weren't put in our hearts to be falsely filled with masses of followers and likes.

I do it. I check to see how many people "like" something I post. I think we all do if we're honest with ourselves. We want people to like us. Why wouldn't we?

But social media does not create real relationships on most occasions. I can think of less than 3 people who I would call a friend thanks to social media. I know that's something, but how many more would if be if I were choosing to spend my time differently? I can't help but wonder.

Even as I write this, I have been on instagram and scrolled through the newsfeed of facebook. Part of me doesn't want to do this, and another part of me knows I need to.

It's time to draw a line in the sand and walk away.

There's this song by Matt Redman called Wide as the Sky. We sang it at church today. Part of the lyrics say, "let all the other names fade away until there's only you....Jesus take your place. Jesus take your place." Those words rang in my soul as an anthem. I need all the other names to fade away. I need Jesus to take His rightful place in my life. For that to happen, I have to draw a line in the sand, turn, and run the other way.

I am sort of black and white like that. Dramatic. Slightly crazy.

so.....I'm logging off of social media for 1 year.

Go ahead....catch your breath and breathe.

Crazy huh?

But what if it's not such a crazy idea? What if it's the best idea I've had yet?

My kids need my face and my attention and my desires, so I'm being dramatic about it.

I'm walking away from the chorus to learn the sound of my own voice. 

I started making a list today of things I want to do but never seem to have time to do....things like: write more, read, dream, create, take pictures (real ones), grow, change, run, serve, cook, call, build, connect, love, give, save. 

I want to find that which is true and real and tangible. I don't want to compare myself anymore. I don't want to read other people's constant complaints. I want to live and live well. 

So it may be weird but I'm doing it.....1 year completely disconnected from social media. Will it make me different? Most definitely. Will it change me? Absolutely. Do I want to be different and changed? Desperately. 

But here's the deal. If you want to know what's going on with us and this crazy journey, you'll have to follow on the blog. I'm still writing, but I'm not posting on facebook.

There are a couple ways you can follow. You'll find them all to the right of this post. There are basically 3 ways to stay connected. 

1. Follow by email. You just type your email address in the box just to the right over there. You'll get all the posts delivered to your inbox. 
2. Follow by bloglovin' which means clicking on the purple plus sign at the top of the right-hand column. I personally use bloglovin' to follow all the blogs I read and find it to be the easiest. 
3. Or you can click that blue button to the right that says Join this Site. You'll be added to the followers list as well. 

Another note on "following." Isn't it interesting how Jesus tells us to follow Him and we now "follow" all these people on social media? Just an interesting thought as I'm asking you to follow me. 

So that's it. Things are changing around here. There will be challenges. The world is on social media. A lot of my business is done on social media. I'll figure it out. Heck, maybe I'll pick up the phone and call people. But my soul is crying for something different....something richer....something more meaningful. I guess we'll see if I can get there.