The fine line

There is a fine line between scheduled and over scheduled. 

There is a fine line between to do and done and overdone. 

There is a fine line between disciplined and uptight. 

There is a fine line between involved parent and helicopter parent. 

But where is the line and how do I know when I've crossed it? 

I got up early this morning to run. And it was beautiful and perfect and just what I needed. And I saw this on the way home. 

I figured a new school routine would mean I would have to get up early to have any time to myself. And I immediately thought, "Oh! I'll do this everyday!"

No. 

Chill. 

Most days. Not everyday. 

I'm not doing that this year. Life is messy and beautiful and unpredictable and I'm not going to set myself up for failure. 

So I'm going to try a little harder, to do a little better, one day at a time. And I'm not going to cross the line into crazy. At least, I'm going to try not to cross the line into crazy. 

I guess this post is a result of me thinking about grace a lot lately. 

The Lord's grace is so perfect. He doesn't want us to be perfect. He just wants us to be us. And sometimes that means messy and beautiful and unpredictable. And that's okay with me. 

He put a lot on my heart today. He asked me to consider something. I don't know if the circumstance will ever come to pass, but he asked me ask myself, what if? Could you? Would you? 

He did the same thing with a little boy named Cash. His momma made some bad choices and he ended up in foster care under the care of his relatives. At the time, we were working through our foster care certification, and I wanted him so badly. But we were in different counties, and our paper work wasn't complete yet. 

But the Lord brought him into my life to ask me, "What if? Could you? Would you?" And I started to ask myself how I would love someone else's baby and if I even could. And that baby that I only held once, made me ask myself questions that I had never asked myself before. 

And today, with a few simple words, I'm asking myself questions that I have never asked myself before? 

If that were to happen, could I do it well? Would I be willing to do it? And if not us, then who? 

In the midst of all that questioning, I was sweetly reminded that no matter what, I don't have to be perfect. I don't have to push the line. I can just be me. Trying to little harder, to be a little better, one day at a time. 

I'm not defined by where I fall in the line. I am who I am because of who I walk the line with. 

 Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. Lamentations 3:23